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Forest Life, by Shane Crash
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Forest Life by Shane Crash follows Emmett Thompson as he retreats to seclusion in the woods of Paris, Tennessee. After suffering the loss of a loved one, Emmett struggles to sustain the will to live. He must confront his suffering and overcome it, before it permanently destroys him. Forest Life is a powerful narrative of suffering and triumph in the face of despair. Crash's debut novel explores themes of absurdism, existentialism, and faith - intertwined in a wonderfully sincere narrative.
- Sales Rank: #4199663 in Books
- Published on: 2012-08-27
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .41" w x 5.50" l, .47 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 178 pages
From the Author
I decided that I could write this novel [Forest Life] a few years back in San Diego. I was sitting in a puddle of my vomit beside my friend, Jordan. He didn't complain as he mopped up my mess, just rubbed my back and comforted me as I lamented my seemingly irreparable sorrow. Earlier in the evening I'd nearly drowned myself in shots of bourbon. The distraction of bouncing around the country had worn off. Jordan did his best to comfort me that night. Everyone should have a friend like Jordan.
For the past couple years, I've been putting pieces of my life together. I sat down and mapped out each section as an event. Consciously, I wrote each period of my life into the book. I tried my best to keep the story fictional, but it's filled with Easter eggs, hidden 'I love yous' and apologies are sprinkled all over. For months I'd sit with a small glass of bourbon or a glass of beer and pour out my memories, fictionalizing them the best I could manage. Through the writing process, lots of forgotten memories surfaced. It was a rough time, full of drunken strolls through Kansas City, Brooklyn, and Paris.
In Kansas City, before I met my wife, I lived with a few friends in an apartment downtown.
We formed a little family unit and carried one another through our various struggles. I was intoxicated almost all day every day and especially at night. I'd walk down the street to a gas station where I'd purchase five dollar peach vodka to fuel my writing binges. My beautiful housemates, Britt and Molly, would nurse me back to health whenever I lost control and vomited or collapsed into hysterics. One night I walked down to a fountain at the Kansas Art Institute. I stuck my head in the water and tried to drown myself. It didn't work so I walked home, cold and wet, and I started drinking some more. It was the last of several attempts to end my life.
I made a lot of mistakes when I was younger, struggled with a lot of grief, and unhealthy coping habits. Those habits cost me a few of my loved ones. It took me a while to figure out that I was destroying my life by drinking myself to death. Unfortunately, by the time I'd sobered up, I'd already robbed myself of my youth. I guess this shows in Forest Life. The general consensus seems to be that I write like a young man forced to suffer the grief of someone much older. Much of the story is a testament to the power of grief -- it's ability to render life an aimless blur of suffering.
When I was writing the book I tried to counter my observation of grief with an antidote -- that antidote being love. People often ask me about faith, about my disbelief in a deity, about where I stand on theological views. The truth is that I don't have much faith, and maybe this is because of the grief I endured all those years. I don't have faith in the traditional sense, in the sense that I believe some narrative to be true and chuck full of answers. However, I do have faith in an unconventional sense, at least I attempt to have faith. I attempt to have faith in goodness, in love, and compassion. I try to have faith that believing in a particular explanation for this mess down here on planet earth is less important than choosing to believe in the infallibility of love.
In Forest Life I'm very honest about the power of suffering, and its ability to strip a person of the will to live. It may not do my own grief justice, I don't know, but I attempt to honestly convey the nature of my own suffering. In the midst of this chaos I believe there's goodness to be found.
- Shane Crash
From the Inside Flap
Forest Life is a refreshing and rewarding read, dark and provocative in parts, but bursting with emotion and life. It is a modern elegy, recalling the mournfulness and sadness of human existence while it simultaneously draws on the beauty of nature. Crash demonstrates rare wisdom and insight for his age. Crash is a brilliant young writer, and I'll be keeping an eye open for his next novel.
- Travis Warren Cooper
Anthropologist, Ethnographer, Historian
Forest Life is in its entirety, a masterful piece of writing, full of raging emotion and quiet contemplation. Forest Life is easily the best fiction this year, and Shane Crash is one of the best new American authors. Forest Life is a tremendous achievement and a must read.
- Anthony Mathenia
Author of Happiness: How to Find It, and Paradise Earth (Curiosity Quills 2012)
About the Author
Shane Crash is an American author and activist. He's published several zines centered on alleviating poverty and homelessness. In 2009 he co-authored a collection of satire and poetry in the short zine, Lost Thoughts. And in 2010 he released Travel Logs, a short chronicle of his travels across the globe.
He's a student of cosmology and physics. From the age of 21 to 23, Shane traveled the world, voluntarily homeless, living out of a backpack, traveling from city to city. Shane has partnered with the Catholic Worker House to care for single mothers fleeing abuse. He's also partnered with the Catholic Workers to tutor immigrants, teaching English, and American history.
Shane often speaks on nonviolence and social responsibility. He runs Pacifist Army, a volunteer group of nonviolent activists who raise awareness on various social issues, including nonviolence and poverty.
Shane passionately advocates for education and nonviolent alternatives to war. He's a fan of marvel comics and pizza.
Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
A tremendous novel about love and loss, life and death.
By ARM
As I read the harrowing opening chapters of Forest Life by Shane Crash I was reminded of Nirvana's unplugged cover of 'Where Did You Sleep Last Night?' There is that perfect moment at the end of the performance where Kurt Cobain's voice breaks, giving way to a haunting guttural sigh that hangs in the air. However heartbreaking, there is an intrinsic beauty in the moment's emotional purity. Forest Life often captures such a feeling. It opens on a young man named Emmett who retreats to the woods of Tennessee to contemplate love and loss, life and death. In Forest Life the loss of a loved one hangs like a woodland canopy over the narrator, darkening his vision even more than the American Honey whiskey he uses to self-medicate. From his pain-addled perspective, the only viable exit is suicide. In this work, a pearl handled straight razor is Chekov's gun. However, this is not a novel about suicide, and any attempt to characterize it as such is a failure of vision. Despite the blood pumping through his broken heart, the narrator can already be seen as dead. Thus the narrative is about resurrection and rising out of hell. "Everyone who lives and loves is a phoenix," the narrator often recalls.
There is a spiritual element in Forest Life, sometimes embraced and sometimes denied. Within the novel there is poignant empathy as the main character sees his pain mirrored in back alleys filled with the hurting homeless as well as in the faces of pew sitters in a Baptist church, as if we are all one, trying to understand our suffering and put a God shaped puzzle together. When it comes to the belief in God, there is a certain empirical curiosity, at times the narrator rails at God and Heaven and then in other moments succumbs to its seduction:
"I can't help but confess to myself that the author of creation must be very lovely to have created mountains, oceans and forests. My ever-shifting view of whether "God" does or doesn't exist does not feel like something that can ever be resolved in me."
The faith in Forest Life is a cautious one. It presents itself as a primal force revealed in the stars, in the mountains, and especially in the forests where the narrator sojourns to find answers. He observes:
"Nights like these cause a black loneliness. The shadows of the trees sweep over me and I swear some elemental force is attempting to comfort me. It is then that "something," some imperceptible piece of my brain considers putting itself back together, but I try to resist it."
Invariably there will be those that will focus on the occasional expletives or depictions of sex and herald (or deride) this work as some sort of edgy Christian fiction, the literary equivalent of a pastor in ripped blue jeans and an Affliction t-shirt. Such a view would be inappropriately shallow; the depth of emotional honesty of Forest Life is what should be embraced by both believers and non-believers. It is refreshing to find a faith-colored work that is stripped of external cliché, to get to the spiritual blood and guts. This courageous work offers a candid admission that even for believers there are no easy answers, and worn Bible verses can only go so far. The novel equally admits that cold rationality offers no solace in the face of suffering.
Above all, Forest Life is a book about love. Love acts as a balance to the deep despair. The novel is at its most spiritual when presenting the idea that at the end of the day, despite loss and pain and suffering, love ultimately wins. It brought to my mind the oft-quoted Bible verse: "For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." Unfortunately flippant overuse on sporting event signs and bumper stickers has robbed this statement of its incredible power. However, at its root there is the idea that God's great love compels him to descend to wallow with us in our own shit and save us from our own living hell. This same, self-sacrificing love is on display in Forest Life. Even though the narrator tries to remove himself to lurk in his own self-loathing, others intrude into his black despair, carrying the light of love. It is a redemptive act that taps into the undercurrent of resurrection.
Forest Life is at its best when the text invokes existential navel-gazing. The prose is rich and alive, with page after page offering brilliant quotes. ("I'm unable to join my love - alone in the alone.") Unfortunately, the dialogue occasionally fails to manifest the same finesse and subtlety. This is a small quibble, for what is in its entirety, a masterful piece of writing, full of raging emotion and quiet contemplation. Forest Life is easily the best fiction this year, and Shane Crash is one of the best new American authors. Forest Life is a tremendous achievement and a must read.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
A review by a guy who loves classic literature, but not in a hipster sort of way to impress people...
By Jared Hamline
It was a cloudy day, so of course I was listening to Billy Corgan on Pandora. It's a nice array of Billy Corgan, The Cure, Muse, Depeche Mode, Smashing Pumpkins, A Perfect Circle, David Bowie, Iggy Pop, and the like. Then, what so happens to drop in my lap (and by 'lap' I mean 'email box'), but a copy of Shane Crash's "Forest Life". What an excellent mixture of sorts! Gloomy weather, an angsty soundtrack, and Shane's first full fledged novel.
"Forest Life" is about Emmett, a young man in his early 20's who experiences the loss of his love, Lenai, and has completely settled on the idea of ending it all at a cabin in Paris, Tennessee by the beatiful Kentucky Lake and the forest surrounding it. The first few pages and randomly throughout the book, it felt strangely reminiscent of one my favorite poems by Edgar Allen Poe, "Ulalume". "Ulalume" is a lyrical poem about an anguished and lonely man who finds himself wandering to lake of Auber where his love died the year before. And by having read (and loved) that poem, I believe they have much in common.
"The skies they were ashen and sober; The leaves they were crisp and sere-The leaves they were withering and sere; It was night in the lonesome October Of my most immemorial year; It was hard by the dim lake of Auber, In the misty mid region of Weir-It was down by the dank tarn of Auber, In the ghoul-haunted woodland of Weir." -E. Poe-
We are introduced to Emmett by his entering of the cabin and his deciding in some sort of morbid contentment, "This is a nice place to die". Then, what follows, is a tour through the mind of a troubled and desperate man, drinking to forget his pain and waiting for the perfect time to drag a French straight razor down his arm and bid this pitiful world adieu. Well... maybe not a "perfect time" so much as the courage to do so. He can't seem to drink himself to death, so he is left with his thoughts as he wanders the lake in a drunken state. He is an exceptionally astute young man and very self aware. What we gradually learn about Emmett, is that he is afraid to rebuild himself out of fear that it means getting over his lost love.
It's a wonderful coincidence to find that "Forest Life" and Edgar Allen Poe have two recurring themes, that is death and love. What surprised me the most with Shane's novel was the second theme, love. Because what you would presume to be a novel of suicide and lost love, there also is predominantly, a love story. Though, a bit mushy and juvenile at times (the two of them ARE in their early 20's), it is what gives us any hope that Emmett may make it to the end of the novel. Despite what could blossom into a healing and loving relationship, Emmett's constant wall building, over-thinking, and alcoholism constantly gets in the way. But, yet, you still want to champion what the relationship could be and not what it may turn out to be in the end...dead in the water.
The interal monologue that occurs makes you very aware that Emmett doesn't have an affinity for many things in American culture. Which, if you know Shane or have read his past works, there is a great big ol' helping of satire and social commentary. Nothing seems to be off limits or overlooked. Social trends, money, movies and music references, and most of all science, all seem to make appearances throughout. But, American "Christianity" and faith in God seem to take the cake.
Struggles with belief and disbelief in God are as big of a battle internally for him, as much as the alcoholism that plagues him externally. By no means is this a "Christian novel" (or what I refer to as "Diet Literature"). It is a struggling balance of death and love and things that sway that invisible scale, whether those things are religion, politics, family, or anything else.
In all honesty, this novel is a self reflection of the man who is writing it. A confession to the world of the things that has plagued him for years of his existence and still does to this day. Emmett just plays an apparatus to the author, to reveal his brokeness and thoughts. It's raw and there are times you don't cheer for Emmett. There are times you wonder why he keeps on going. He's selfish, pessimistic, and nihilistic. But, there are some moments when you see his true self shine through and find redeeming qualities to him. And honestly, how are we that much different than him? We are more self concerned than what we give ourselves credit for, at least the guy is honest.
All in all, this book lived up to the personal hype that I built up in me when I heard Shane was writing it. The story, despite some of its darker content, was quite refreshing and I felt very satisfied after reading it. I could keep going on and on about symbolism in the book, the social commentary,recurring themes, winks, nudges, and inside jokes, but this is a review, not an analysis. For this being Shane Crash's first true novel, I have to say... It's a hell of a start and am looking forward to more quality works like this in the future. I can't tell you what wins in the end, death or love, in the story of Emmett. But, if you get the book, something tells me you'll find out.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
" Forest Life: by Shane Crash "...radical, scandalous redemptive imagination
By the Weary Pilgrim
For years I have been exploring the idea of faith on the fringe of church-ianity and beyond. I like to explore what I call, " radical, scandalous redemptive imagination." I believe our old maps are worn out, in a landscape that has changed dramatically, and continues to undergo rapid change...old maps can not take us into new lands. I believe poets, story tellers and artists have the uncanny ability to be new world prophets...to resurrect old myths, create new metaphors to recapture the imagination of humanity towards a horizon of hope.
Shane Fulgrum ( Crash ), is a new world prophet. I was away from the computer, cell phone and all forms of social media last week and immersed my self into a draft copy of Shane's upcoming book, " Forest Life."
Shane said, this as to " Why I Wrote Forest Life "...
Even after all this time, I still don't know how to live. There are moments here and there when I understand some of the things that I need to live. I need good friendship. I need to write and I need quiet emptiness. Unfortunately, I still spend too much time thinking about things that make my brain bleed. Sometimes I just think so much that my brain will shut itself down in a futile attempt at self-preservation. I haven't been able to transcend my frustration and anger for society and its inability to match up with my ideals. My ideals being peaceful coexistence and productive progress. Some people reconcile this sadness by telling themselves that God's gonna come back and fix things up real nice. I want to believe nice things like restorative theology, but I just can't. I am understanding of those who subscribe to comforting narratives. I'd rather not see the world as cruel and chaotic, but I digress. Hence, my attempts to understand how I should live in a world that doesn't make sense.
Although Forest Life is almost entirely fictional, the frustration and struggle of the lead character often mirrors my own irreconcilable sadness and confusion. Existence is a strange thing. It was on a cabin porch in the Tennessee dusk, nearly three years when I realized that my experience was a universal dilemma for conscious freethinkers. And so as the sky grew salty and the winds picked up, the rain began to fall through a halo sunrise and I found my story - the story of Emmett.
I have had the opportunity to follow Shane through his website, and musings on Facebook...he thinks deeply, he struggles and wrestles with life, any idea of faith can not be contained to a building, a book or any system of salvation. Shane's musing are messy...sometimes it looks like vomit on a page. They may not be attractive, but, they are shockingly real.
" Me? I'm afraid if God does exist, if there is a creator, he's just as confused about life and death and love as I am. Mostly I'm afraid that I'll continue to exist after I die."
" Why are you afraid of that?"
I'm silent for a moment. I collect my thoughts and wait for the desperation to recede.
" If I do continue to exist, if my reality and perception continues on in some other plane, it means that everything happening here means something. I'm worried I won't figure out what it all means in time. Sometimes I feel like I'm doomed to screw it up and be punished for it. Maybe I'm already being punished." I can hear the emotion in my own voice, making it a shade huskier. I wonder if Maraye notices. ( Forest Life, page 64-64 )
Emmett, is the main character in this story, and if we're honest we'll see a bit of Emmett is us, or in the friends around us. If we're honest Emmett's story is " our " story...a story deeply embedded in life, and the struggle to make sense of life, here, now...and somehow beyond.
This was probably one of the most faith-filled books I have read in a long time...maybe somewhere along side " William P. Young's, The Shack." If you have all your theology nicely sorted out in your " God-box ", this book will stretch you...maybe get rid of your box all together. This book looks at guilt, forgiveness, hope, redemption, love, pain, suffering, death, life, heaven, hell...but it does it not in a nicely mapped out theological landscape...it does it in the messiness and chaos of real life.
There were times I was reading and I had to remind myself that this is the writing of a 25 year old young man. Shane is wise beyond his years...he is a wise spiritual sage in a young man's clothes. For the life of me, I can't remember wrestling with such thoughts at a young age.
Before I sleep I normally lie awake and think of the future. I've resolved I can't understand life the way I can understand an equation or formula. For so long I've wanted to find concrete answers or die trying. It's hard at first to find comfort in not knowing or to make peace with it. But I think it is the only way to make it in this life. Getting stuck on a question only makes me estranged from the world. ( Forest Life, page 174 )
I can not say enough about this book...buy it, buy a copy for friends...have conversations over coffee, re-kindle some redemptive imagination, discover a new kind of faith in the midst of this profound human drama called life.
Oh yeah, Shane said this about writing the book...
" When I started writing Forest Life, I was suicidal and drunk because I had lost someone I love to a tragedy. Afterward, my question was this: why love when death and suffering are inevitable? I won't reveal my solution to this problem, but I do present it in the pages of the book. These are only a few of the issues I grapple with in the story and I hope that you'll read the story and consciously address your own uncertainty and fear."
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